Book pitch

Apparently when I said I would post my pitch in a day or two, I meant more than a week.   So while my oldest is at school and my youngest is roaming around, getting into who knows what, I’m finishing this up and posting it.

Trying to compress my book into 250 words was harder than I thought it would be.  It didn’t help that my husband didn’t like my first few pitches and I started over each time.  It still needs some work, but here it is…

While 13 year old Eva Thomas sleeps, she dreams of a colorless forest with unseen eyes.  Unseen eyes that are watching her.  As she stands motionless, surrounded by the pale trees, a darkness slowly seeps in.  It gets closer.  Dread sweeps through her.  She runs.  She looks back to see if the darkness is following, even though she knows it is, and trips on the uneven ground.  Before she can get up, the darkness caused by the Shadow is upon her.  The Shadow, a cloaked and hooded figure, stands over her.  Before Eva can scream, a knife is plunged into her.  Instead of her heart that she knows is his aim, the blade goes into and through her side.  She hears his shriek of anger as she wakes, gasping.  Her hands clutch her side.  When she looks down, she sees blood oozing from the gash.  As she stares, the wound heals itself leaving no mark.  Is she still dreaming?

Exhausted from her troubled sleep, Eva stumbles through her days.  She longs for the comfort and familiarity of the only home she’s ever known, but with her parents’ recent divorce and moving away from her father, her life will never be the same.  She struggles being the new girl at school in the town where her grandmother is known as a kook.  Now, she has to figure out what is happening with her dreams and who the Shadow is.  Can she save her dreams and herself before it’s too late?

Confusing?  Intriguing?  Boring?  Constructive criticism is welcome.  Let me know what you think.  Hopefully it will be one of the 25 pitches randomly selected.  I’ll let you know.


2 thoughts on “Book pitch

  1. katetraci says:

    Intriguing! Definitely. I have yet to write a pitch, sounds extremely difficult. Do you need more of what will happen in the end? Or is the purpose to really intrigue the agent as much as the reader?
    love it!

    • exhaustedmama says:

      Thanks Kate! I could be wrong, but from my understanding, it’s similar to what you would find on a book jacket. The purpose is definately to intrigue an agent and/or a publisher so they’ll ask for the manuscript. You have enough to write a pitch for your book. You still have two days.

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